We Lost Our Beloved Pup This Weekend








The day had finally come.  On Saturday, we had to say goodbye to our sweet, sweet Kensi, an important and beloved member of our family.  She was almost 15 years old (her birthday would have been on March 1, 2016).  My husband and I got her as a puppy from a rescue in May 2001.  She has been the best dog a family could ever hope for!  I don’t even know what to do with this hole in my heart her absence has left.  How do you move on when your best friend is gone?  For almost 15 years, she has been there with me, every day.  When I’d sit at my computer and work, she was sleeping by my feet.  She’d follow me from room to room.  She was always there with our family, and enjoyed going anywhere we would take her — on walks, on weekend trips to my mom’s house, to the beach, and most of all, just hanging out at home.  I spent more time with her than with most people I know.

She was getting older.  Her health was starting to slip. She couldn’t hear anymore.  She had cataracts.  But she seemed fine.  Until just a few weeks ago.  She had changed.  She had really slowed down, and lost a lot of weight.  In her final 2 days, she became restless, couldn’t relax.  We knew.  We took her to the vet and he told us she had cancer, and it was systemic.  I only needed to know one thing.  “Is she in pain?” I asked.  He said that she was.  And while it wasn’t the kind of excruciating pain as when one has a broken bone, it was a more global and constant pain, as if she had a really bad flu (that wasn’t going to get better).  “She doesn’t feel well,” he said.  That was all I needed to know.  It was time to let her go.

I stayed in the room with her, petting and kissing her head, telling her over and over how wonderful she was and how much I loved her.  And she fell asleep, peacefully.  I will miss her forever.

We all know that dogs don’t live as long as humans, and that one day we’ll have to say goodbye.  And lately I had known that it would be happening soon.  But all of this knowing does not prepare you for how much it hurts.

Kensi was the best dog in the world (and I had told her this every single day).

Here is a post I wrote for her six years ago: http://mommylolo.com/2010/03/01/dear-kensi-my-other-baby-on-your-9th-birthday/

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